A Good Friend

I think everyone has a different idea about what this is. For me it’s someone who is going to be there for me during the good times and the bad. Someone who, when they say they want to help, actually come through and help. A good friend is someone who has seen me at my worst and still wants to be my friend. A good friend is someone is going to support me emotionally, spiritually and sometimes even physically as well as someone who will cheer me on in whatever my dreams in life are. A good friend is also someone who will tell me when they think I am doing something wrong, that I’m acting like a jerk or making a seriously bad decision.

Right now I’m struggling a lot with that last part in trying to be a good friend. It’s really hard to see your friends making bad decisions (or maybe it’s just what I consider to be a bad decision). How do you express your concerns without making it seem like you are judging them? And how do you express your concern if you’re not sure your friend wants to or is ready to hear them? I do know that if you do express your concerns, do it once and let it go. Don’t harp on them to that person. They know what you think and how you feel and they can take it or leave it.

I do know that having a good friend and being a good friend takes a lot work, just like any relationship, there is give and take. Are you a good friend if you stand by someone who treats you like crap over and over again because you have a history? And does that make you a good friend or just an enabler to their problems?

I know I expect a lot from my friends (which may be why I don’t have a lot of really good friends) but I’m sure they know that I am fully capable and willing to be a good friend in return. I don’t say things I don’t mean. I’m not flakey about getting together with my friends. And if I have to cancel something, I better have a really good reason and a good apology. And I don’t like to see my good friends being treated badly by other people, especially people who are supposed to be friends themselves. Unfortunately I see that a lot.

So there you go, I’ve put it out there. This is what I expect from a good friend. Take it or leave it. Next to my family, good friends are the most important thing out there and the people I want to share my life with. And to all my good friends out there, thank you.