What to Wear, What Not to Wear, Part II

I love the TLC television show What Not to Wear. If you’ve never watched this show, host Stacy London and Clinton Kelly single out women (I have seen one show with a man) who dress terribly. In most cases it’s because the women have self-esteem issues related to their body (and who doesn’t?). Of course, sometimes these women are just clueless about fashion. What I like about Stacy and Clinton is that, while they use humor to point out what these women are wear is hideous, they are really sensitive to the issues these women have. Their advise: learn how to dress based on the body you have. It doesn’t matter if you have a big butt, flat chest, huge thighs or dangling underarms, there are clothes out there that can make you look better and make you feel better about yourself.

I have a quote from Clinton Kelly taped to my full length mirror (side note: everyone woman should look in a full length mirror before she leaves the house) that says “What you wears tells the world how you want to be treated.” I totally believe that. If you dress classy people will treat you different then if you dress like a slob. That doesn’t mean you can’t run to the supermarket in sweats but I wouldn’t recommend doing it often. Just take a little bit of time to make yourself look good.

Now I will admit I am no fashionista. I don’t read fashion magazines or shop in trendy stores (I don’t have the budget for that). But I, like everyone else, have my own sense of style. It’s just that some people’s sense of style is…well, terrible. And I think a lot of it is common sense. Now, of course, what you wear in the privacy of your home is totally up to you but when you go out in public use common sense. So here are my common sense style tips:

1. If you have boobies, wear a bra (this is not a given as I know women who don’t). Believe me, people can totally tell if you’re not wearing a bra (and unless you’re a college girl on spring break in Florida, it’s not a sexy look). Having those boobies hang down to nearly your belly button is a dead give-a-way. It’s not an attractive look. And even if you don’t have boobies, unless you have on a thick sweater, wear a bra. Nobody wants to see nipples either.

2. Do not wear Crocs out in public. I know Crocs are supposed to be very comfortable but these are shoes made entirely of rubber and were never meant to be worn in public. They were meant to be worn in your backyard garden. These are the least attractive piece of footwear in the history of footwear.

3. After a certain age, certain pieces of clothing should not be worn. That age may vary but many of restrictions happen around the time you turn 30. I don’t care how great a body you have, a woman in her fifties should NOT be wearing short-shorts. And no woman past the age of 30 should wear sweat pants/work-out pants with words across the ass (do you really want to draw attention to your ass by having the word “juicy” of “sassy” on it?). And unless you work on a farm, nobody over the age of 12 should wear overalls.

4. Wear clothes that fit properly. This doesn’t mean wear clothes that are two sizes too big, but nobody wants to see blubber hanging over a pair of low ride jeans or butt cracks (this is NEVER in style). The biggest culprit I see in this area is jeans. If you are skinny and can wear skinny jeans that fit properly, kudos to you. But if you aren’t skinny, wear jeans that fit. And wear ones that are fashionable and age appropriate. Just because you’re a Mom doesn’t mean you have to wear Mom jeans.

5. When shopping, try clothes on. Something that looks great on the hanger may not look great on you, and vice versa. Try something that might be out of your comfort zone or style, you may be surprised. And taking a note from Stacy and Clinton, be realistic about your size. You aren’t going to look good in something that you know is two sizes too small before you even get to a dressing room.

6. Bath. If you haven’t showered in two days and your hair is greasy, nobody is going to notice that you are dressed nicely. They are going to notice the greasy hair and that is not fashionable. Which leads me to...

7. Don’t go overboard with the perfume or cologne. This is a big pet peeve of mine. I hate getting on the elevator alone but can smell what the person who just got off (someone I haven’t even seen) smells like. Also, if someone is walking 10 feet behind you and starts to cough, you’re got too much perfume or cologne on.

Okay, so I kind of got off the topic of fashion and into the realm of personal hygiene but kind of go together. And you may think my advice is crap but there it is. But I do think that clothes can help you feel better about yourself. You just have to know what looks good on your body. It may take some effort but I think it’s probably worth it.